It's always said, "Treat your family like friends, and your friends like family". We have that conscious effort to speak politely to our friends and oftentimes we let pass this communication skill when it already comes to our family-- our partner. Because as we say it, "it's only family".
Years of affectionate closeness with our partner make us find ourselves feeling like a sloppy closet: dull and customary. Over the time, this familiarity breeds contempt and disregard. Suddenly we want something else for ourselves like we want what we have in mind to be heard by talking, always!
For our feelings to be recognized, we unerringly believe that we must continuously communicate with our partner. But there are rules to how we can do it effectively.
1. Right timing
Initiate a conversation at the time your partner can respond pleasantly. There's no well- taken conversation with a bad timing.
2. Right tone of voice
It's not what you say but how you say it that matters, mostly. If you really intend to clear things out, make sure you are easy to listen to. Compose yourself and calm your voice before you even attempt to talk. They say, a 10- second rule is effective. That is, you have to be silent for ten seconds before you say anything back to the one you are arguing with. Remember, "A gentle answer quiets anger, but a harsh one stirs it up" ~ Proverbs 15: 1.
3. Right point
Think as you speak. And be clear and direct with what you mean.
4. Right mood
Be less negative and more positive and appreciative. Pick words that are more inclined to getting at solving the problems.
5. Right attitude
Your partner may not always agree with you. But be willing to listen and care for his comfort as you do about your own. Learn to be sensitive to his feelings, too.
6. Right bent
Be sincerely willing to solve any issue and take things forward to a better one. The more you are inclined to talk to your partner, the more that you take your connection to a higher level. "Conversation is an art, and opportunities to develop it should be encouraged." ~ Nancy Van Pelt.
Show off the right ingenuity towards bettering your relationship. On a second thought you might ask, "How do I really listen to my partner effectively?". Well, tune in on my next post on RELATIONSHIPS.
God bless your heart!
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