First of all, I would like to greet all the long time dads, new dads, and soon-to-be dads in the world a HAPPY FATHER’S DAY.
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| Image taken from weheartit.com |
Few days ago when NBA and the Lunar Eclipse were the trending topics on the twitter timeline, I caught site of a twitter hashtag hanging at the bottom of the top 10 trending topics that goes, #thatsmydad. I could only remember one thing about my dad that would suit the hashtag pretty well and I tweeted, “someone who plays guitar and sings me ballad #thatsmydad”.
I don’t exactly know how other families would usually have a good time on father’s day. I for real grew up in a family where celebrating such occasions is so unlikely, at odds to what I typically hear from others where preparations are really done for their father say, a special dinner.
“I love you” is a not so familiar line inside the home. After my mother remained a plain housewife for few years, suddenly had to start a job in the city government. And my father, focused most of his time and attention on politics when he started serving as a Barangay Chairman in 1995. My brother was 9 years old then while I was 5.
Apparently, politics became part of our daily life since then. It wasn’t until I also turned 9 that I mustered the courage to write him a letter for the father’s day (thanks to the 90’s educational TV series for reminding me of such a good conduct) because I thought it’s only on those kinds of occasion that I get the chance to thank him for all he’s done and to let him know that I love him.
There were times when I would only see my letters for him run into the trash bin few days after. Though I’ve realized my father surely didn’t intend to throw my billet-doux. I remember my aunt even said, “Don’t be discouraged, you know your parents aren’t really fond of emotions popping off letters”.
We all in the family hardly recognize feelings and thank each other. Endearments are taboo in that trying to open up something like it makes for a very awkward conversation. Though I know the Filipino culture where families are really valued (well I still hope despite of all the issues the country is facing now), father’s day is supposed to be a day when everybody, most importantly children have to give honor to their father and make him feel like he’s the greatest, the best and the most special dad there is.
As children grow up, perspectives change and greeting dads on father’s day grow to be less and less of a priority. All the greetings if not forgotten just become perfunctory. Some start to move and have families of their own while others get too busy with their individual jobs. I don’t know how fathers really react to this. It is probably one of the hardest things a father or a parent for that matter could ever learn to do and accept as being parents, the stage of emancipation where one has to understand that his children are never his own .
I have seen my father really worked his best in serving the public for actually more than fifteen years. I should know just by considering how he works all night studying all laws, statutes, codes, and ordinances for the barangay. He always makes sure all files are ready and barangay fund management as well as the budget allocations are clearly explained and accounted on resolutions. That speaks aside of how he also tries to check on the treasurer that all barangay expenses should be accordingly liquidated. These are some of the many things he religiously does apart from his executory roles and responsibilities. It’s like there is nothing in the barangay that he doesn’t know. Other barangay chairmen visit our house to ask for my his help and opinion on certain barangay matters. He knows every detail of it. Random people knocking at our door early in the morning or even late at night to have an appointment with him also became a routinary. I have learned that public service is like a 24 hour duty because of that. Yet he would do it willingly.
He has passed several resolutions and improved our place abundantly. His colleagues only believed in him so much that he was elected as the Vice-president for Alliance for Barangay Concerns in the whole city of Tacloban during his last term, that which the latter is a political party in the Philippines.
Entering the political arena is a two-edged sword; you can still get depreciated despite a good service. People would always have something to say. That’s why I had to ask my father once, “Pa, why haven’t you continued your career as a seaman and rather pursued politics here?”
He has passed several resolutions and improved our place abundantly. His colleagues only believed in him so much that he was elected as the Vice-president for Alliance for Barangay Concerns in the whole city of Tacloban during his last term, that which the latter is a political party in the Philippines.
Entering the political arena is a two-edged sword; you can still get depreciated despite a good service. People would always have something to say. That’s why I had to ask my father once, “Pa, why haven’t you continued your career as a seaman and rather pursued politics here?”
“Because this is what I only know doing”, he answered.
To others, his answer might sound as if he doesn’t know anything at all except politics. But reading between the lines tells me that what he was trying to say wasn’t really because it’s the only thing he knew of doing but it’s relatively the thing that makes him happy. He enjoys politics, he enjoys relating to people. I thought, yes, we would’ve had a better life if only he worked at his career as a seaman or continued the rice mill business we once had back in the early 90s. But no, my dad camped on the door of politics because that’s where he is truly happy and it is where he is at his best. Now I couldn’t give him a disagreement on that.
If he wasn’t happy at all he would have already left it after his first term. I wouldn’t have seen the same enthusiasm in him for more than fifteen years. Or yet he could have ventured on another job before when he still had all the opportunities, time, and resources. But he didn’t because it’s in politics that he’s satisfied.
Politics has stolen from our family a considerable amount of time. Even supposing, my father was still able to manage giving us a good life where we could still have what we need and buy things we would rather not have. I consider myself even luckier because I don’t have to use mobile phone, emails, facebook, twitter, skype, or any other modern ways of communicating so as to send a greeting to him as he is all within reach; opposite to those children whose fathers are at a great distance or yet are no longer existent in this world. At least we still have him. I am grateful to see the happiness in him, which is probably the reason why he looks 10 years younger than his age.
A father would definitely be happy seeing his children be able to successfully move across some of life’s rough spots: love affairs, job problems, identity crisis, depression, etc. Parents could only do so much. But I guess the most important thing that a father could ever teach his children about life is quoted in what Clarence Budington Kelland said about his own dad: “My father didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.” And that is how my father taught us as well. He taught us not only the tips on how to succeed in college or find a stable job but how to become the best and the happiest human beings we’re meant to be, wherever we are. He’s not just the father who pays internet bills, and provide for our daily consumption but a father who knows how to live a contented and happy life. There’s nothing else I could not be proud of him.
I never once wanted a perfect father, only a father who could teach me life’s greatest lessons perfectly. And I guess, all fathers out there deserve to be given this one inasmuch as I find my father deserving of this, too:
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| Image taken from parenting.leehansen.com |
I would just like to especially dadi-cate this song to my father:
Video by Alfred and Choy Hong (Jasmine) Grech, Mosta, Malta via youtube.com
And let me quote the line:
"You're my hero. And cause you're my dad, I'm twice as blessed and lucky to be me".
Image/ Video Credits:
parenting.leehansen.com
weheartit.com
Alfred and Choy Hong (Jasmine) Grech, Mosta, Malta via youtube.com
